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Test Those Breasts ™️
This podcast by Jamie Vaughn is a deep-dive discussion on a myriad of breast cancer topics, such as early detection, the initial shock of diagnosis, testing/scans, treatment, loss of hair, caregiving, surgery, emotional support, and advocacy.
These episodes will include breast cancer survivors, thrivers, caregivers, surgeons, oncologists, therapists, and other specialists who can speak to many different topics.
Disclaimer: I am not a doctor and not all information in this podcast comes from qualified health care providers, therefore does not constitute medical advice. For personalized medical advice, you should reach out to one of the qualified healthcare providers interviewed on this podcast and/or seek medical advice from your own providers.
Test Those Breasts ™️
Episode 81: A Journey of Strength & Advocacy: Lea Appleton's Breast Cancer Story at Age 29
Could you imagine facing a breast cancer diagnosis at just 29? My guest, Lea Appleton, did just that, transforming a harrowing experience into a powerful story of resilience and advocacy. Lea, an ICF professional certified coach and bestselling author, joins me to share her journey, from navigating the complexities of the healthcare system to advocating for herself when her concerns were overlooked. Her story shines a light on the critical role of intuition and persistence in health advocacy, particularly for young women confronting the unexpected.
Lea's battle with breast cancer was not just a physical one, but a testament to the strength found in community and kindness. She recounts her choice to undergo a mastectomy and tough chemotherapy sessions, where the simple gesture of a friend bringing donuts offered a moment of comfort. We discuss how innovative campaigns like Know Your Lemons have transformed awareness and education, making breast cancer signs more accessible and less intimidating. Through each wave of treatment, Lea encountered profound examples of human connection that became as vital as the medical interventions themselves.
Beyond the personal, Lea's experience has fueled her mission to support others, both through her coaching practice and volunteer efforts. She offers insights into maintaining a hopeful outlook amid adversity. Our conversation also explores the broader evolution of cancer support, from recovery bras to emotional resources, and Lea’s ongoing commitment to helping others find resilience and purpose through Appleton Coaching .
Contact Lea:
909-575-8252 (mobile)
lea@appletoncoaching.com
Appleton Coaching on Instagram
Walking & Wayfinding: Create Your Own Mindful Practice, One Step at a Time
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I am not a doctor and not all information in this podcast comes from qualified healthcare providers, therefore may not constitute medical advice. For personalized medical advice, you should reach out to one of the qualified healthcare providers interviewed on this podcast and/or seek medical advice from your own providers .
Hello friends, welcome back to the Test those Breasts podcast. I am your host, jamie Vaughn. I'm a retired teacher of 20 years and a breast cancer thriver turned staunch, unapologetic, loud supporter and advocate for others, bringing education and awareness through a myriad of medical experts, therapists, caregivers and other survivors. A breast cancer diagnosis is incredibly overwhelming, with the mounds of information out there, and other survivors A breast cancer diagnosis is incredibly overwhelming, with the mounds of information out there, especially on Dr Google. I get it. I'm not a doctor and I know how important it is to uncover accurate information, which is my ongoing mission through my nonprofit. The podcast includes personal stories and opinions from breast cancer survivors and professional physicians, providing the most up-to-date information. At the time of recording Evidence, research and practices are always changing, so please check the date of the recording and always refer to your medical professionals for the most up-to-date information. I hope you find this podcast a source of inspiration and support from my guests. Their contact information is in the show notes, so please feel free to reach out to them. We have an enormous breast cancer community ready to support you in so many ways. Now let's listen to the next episode of Test those Breasts. Well, hey, friends, welcome back to this episode of Test those Breasts. I am your host, jamie Vaughn, and today I am so excited to have my guest, leah Appleton, on my show.
Speaker 1:So Leah is an ICF professional certified coach and bestselling author of Walking and Wayfinding Create your Own Mindful Practice One step at a time. She works with professionals to improve their well-being at work by helping them align with their values, focus on their strengths and gain insight into their goals through transformative coaching conversations. She has expertise in using mindful practices to reduce stress and build resilience and help people find meaning and purpose in their lives. Prior to becoming a coach, she spent over two decades working in higher education in the United States as an associate dean, helping to build multicultural and interreligious communities. Leah is also a breast cancer survivor for 29 years, diagnosed at age 29,.
Speaker 1:Her early experience dealing with cancer and its treatment shaped the course of her life, causing her to focus on well-being and care of others, whether as a dean of students or a certified coach. Leah has a Master of Arts in Music and a Master of Divinity degree, as well as a coach diploma from Erickson Coaching International. She lives in California with her husband, billy, and has three adult children. Well hello Leah, how are you doing today?
Speaker 2:I am well. Thank you so much for having me on this podcast.
Speaker 1:Absolutely Welcome to the show, and you and I had a wonderful conversation together just recently before we started this particular episode. And the more I find out about you, the more intrigued I am about you just your background and your experience, especially when it comes to helping people with stress and anxiety and things like that, and you know, I mean there's a lot of stress and anxiety in our world right now which you've got your work cut out for you, don't you? Yeah?
Speaker 2:definitely yeah, yeah don't you?
Speaker 1:Yeah, definitely, yeah, yeah. So you know you are a breast cancer survivor of quite some time ago 29, and you were 29 years old, and I want to really stage this in a way that is very appalling how many younger women now are getting breast cancer in their 20s, in their 30s, and usually you know when people think about breast cancer. Well, when we used to think about, should I say, it was usually older women. You know, like me, I was in my 50s, I'm 57 now. I was diagnosed when I was 54. And it's just so appalling how many people are getting it so young, and 29 years ago that was almost unheard of, right? I mean, is that something that you? I mean you must have been pretty shocked. Yes, oh, yes.
Speaker 2:I mean, it was not anywhere on the realm of possibility for me. I don't think I mean, to be honest, I don't think my doctors it was on their realm of possibility Like, oh, it can't be this, I'm sure you have a cyst or whatever. And so it was. I even remember my surgeon apologizing to my parents because they had come to pick me up from the hospital and he had told them that I would be fine and he said I'm really sorry that I assumed everything would be fine and it will be fine, but not fine in the way we had expected or hoped it to be. So it was a really. I really really had to advocate for my own care because it wasn't. You know, people didn't get, I couldn't even get a mammogram because it was like, oh, I'll do an ultrasound and I'm like, oh, I want a mammogram. So yeah, it was a challenge.
Speaker 1:So at age 29,. What were, who were you Like? What was going on in your life leading up to this crazy diagnosis?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I had. Unfortunately, I had been recently divorced. I had a young marriage that didn't last, unfortunately. I was a young professional, I was rebuilding my life, I had lots of friends, so I was just kind of doing things. You know, I would work out and I'd have dinner with friends and I would do the things I enjoyed doing. And it kind of came to a screeching halt at that moment where I was like whoa, wait a second, I'm healthy, I'm young, this is not supposed to be happening to me. So it was a shock.
Speaker 1:So what happened? What is it that made you? How did it all happen? How did you find out?
Speaker 2:Yeah, Well, you know it's a little bit of one of those weird stories, I think, because I had a lump that I felt on the other side and it was big and I don't know, fibrous, and so the doctors were sure that it was a cyst and so they weren't particularly concerned about it, but I had this sense in my gut that something wasn't right. And so that's when I went in and I had the ultrasound and I'm like, yeah, you know, we checked up again in six months and at that point I said I really, really want to have a mammogram. And I had a mammogram and they called and they said there's something suspicious on the other side. So it was like, what Cause? I wasn't, I was just concerned about this thing, I feel, um, and so, yeah, it ended up being, uh, a cancerous tumor, the what carcinoma? Interductal carcinoma, you know, the kind of the one that happens all the time. Yes, um, it was about two centimeters, so I'd been in there for the interdactyl carcinoma, you know, the kind of the one that happens all the time. Yes, it was about two centimeters, so I'd been in there for a while.
Speaker 2:I at that point I didn't know what to do, right, like it was so outside the realm of of reality for me. So I did a lot of that and it was a little bit pre-internet, you know. I mean you could do it, but there was. It was a lot of asking people questions and what do you do in asking doctors questions? And I sought a second opinion and I went out to Cedars-Sinai, which is, you know, known in the LA area as being really good, and they were like yep, yep, these are your options. And so I got really good care. I think my doctors my doctors were great, surprised at this outcome, but they were very supportive, very terrific, allowed me to make my own choices in my care, which I thought was really good, and I remember thinking I chose to have a mastectomy and they were also surprised about that.
Speaker 2:They're like you're young, why would you want to do that? And I'm like well, they were also surprised about that. They're like you're young, why would you want to do that? And I'm like well, I really don't want to deal with this again. This is terrible. And I was scared and when I had the biopsy because of where the tumor was located, it was right in the middle of my breast. In order to remove it, it changed the shape of my breast. It looked weird to me. The nipple pointed out in a funny direction and I'm like I don't want to. No, I want this out and I don't want to deal with it again. So I chose to have a mastectomy. You know, you mentioned that certainly at that time. It's slightly better now, though I don't think hugely better.
Speaker 2:All the choices of bras were like I will never wear that, you that, so things like that. That were sort of surprising for me as a young person. Swimsuits no, not going to wear that. So I spent a lot of time working with people and having people make things for me and I almost started a business. I was like I'm going to create clothing that people can wear that looks like what I might wear. I didn't end up doing that.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, it was a lot of inquiry, a lot of shock. My friends were super supportive. They threw this giant surprise 30th birthday for me because I found out at 29. And then I had the birthday party and I had my surgery. I think the next day or the day after I had the birthday party and I had my surgery, I think the next day or the day after, and so lots of people bringing me food and, you know, loving me and caring for me in this time. But a lot of people didn't know what to say Because, you know, my peers at that point had no experience with this either Maybe their parents, but not with someone their own age. So it was a learning for everybody.
Speaker 1:I think, yes, for sure. It was a learning for everybody. I think, yes, for sure. I think that when somebody has someone close to them who gets a diagnosis like that, it's a learning experience every single time. I know that it was a learning experience for my own husband, for my family, for my friends, which is one of the reasons I started this podcast in the first place is I wanted to be able to help educate, not just from my experience but from a myriad of different experiences, so that people you know had a voice to be able to, you know, talk about their own experiences and what they learned and all of that.
Speaker 1:So I'm just thinking gosh 29 years ago. What a mind blow for people. Thinking gosh 29 years ago, what a mind blow for people, because usually too, is that so many people who are older, who had it years ago or knew their grandmother had it or whatever. Sometimes it was never even talked about. I didn't even know grandma had, that. It was kept so quiet, you know, like it was kept so, so quiet, and now people are pretty open about it. They're out there and talking about it, which is so important.
Speaker 1:I think, and it's also a way for people to process. I mean me talking about it with you and other people is still a way for me to process what happened, right.
Speaker 2:Well, it's still a way for me to process it, even years in your sleeper, because it's a reality that you live with. It doesn't go away. Yes, I do think that it's interesting that you mentioned people not talking about it, because people sort of came out of the woodwork and they were generally older women and they'd be like oh well, I've gone through this, let me help you. I had this woman take me to like well, we can find a place to find a bra and they'll sew in a pocket. I'm like what's that? You know?
Speaker 2:There were people who said do you know about? At that point I don't even know if they have it anymore with the Cancer Society it was a feel good, feel good, be better anyway, and it was like makeup and you know, wigs and things like that and you know. But the people came out of the woodcut to really support me in that process. So I, I I very much valued that. I do think that part of it's cancer, because it's scary, but part of it is that it's breast cancer. People didn't want to talk about breasts and it wasn't okay to say and you could kind of mask it one way or the other.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Well, that's one of the reasons I mean one of the many reasons I joined Know your Lemons and I don't remember if we talked about this or not, but Know your Lemons organization is all about educating people about the 12 signs of breast cancer and you had mentioned let me go back a second here. Did you say that you visually did not like the way your breast was looking? What did that look like?
Speaker 2:Yes, so after the um biopsy they had to take so much tissue out cause it was larger Um and it was directly behind my nipple, so it was right in the middle of my breast.
Speaker 2:So, we'll pick it out. It changed the shape of it in a way that felt uncomfortable to me, and the thing that was interesting is that in my mind and of course we're not totally thinking clearly, but in my mind it was like every time I look at this it's going to remind me and I'm going to be afraid and, interestingly, my scar doesn't give me that same yucky feeling and interestingly, my scar doesn't give me that same yucky feeling.
Speaker 2:It gives me more of this like I went through this really difficult thing and this scar is this beautiful.
Speaker 1:Empowering? Yeah for sure, yeah, okay, so, yeah, okay. So the reason I asked that is I couldn't remember if you said it was after the biopsy or not. So I know that. We know now that there are 12 signs of breast cancer. There are visual signs and signs that you can feel a lump right and so. But that was one of the reasons I joined Know your Lemons, because they don't use breasts. They use lemons as visuals because you know and I just did an episode with the founder Corinne with Know your Lemons a couple of weeks ago and you know we talked about the whole process of why she started Know your Lemons and how she came up with the lemon analogy.
Speaker 1:You know it looks like a breast, but it's not a breast, because when we talk about cancer, we think death and when we talk about breasts we think sex, and so she didn't want that to be like that. So I like the idea of being able to educate people and they can visually see what they can be looking at at their own breast if they have a sign, so okay. So let's talk about your treatments. You went through the surgery after your birthday. Did you go? What stage was it and what did you? What other treatments did you do?
Speaker 2:So my cancer was considered two plus. I don't know what they still do the pluses anymore, but because of its size I didn't have any lymph node involvement. So that was really great. But because I was young and they were scared, they were like let's go at this. And so I think the other thing that, as I'm trying to remember back, I think another I really didn't want to do radiation. So I think that was another reason sort of compounding why I did the mastectomy, because they told me if I did that I didn't have to do radiation. And I think it was mostly the look actually, actually, as I think about it. But anyway, so I had six months of chemotherapy and that was it wasn't. It was not great. It was not the best moments of my life I had to. I was working, so I took leave because I didn't feel well, I was sick a lot. I got it extended longer than six months because I got some reactions Like I got thrush in my mouth and you know some of the things.
Speaker 1:Some of the things.
Speaker 2:I don't talk about where everything's going at your, at your body and all these other immune responses can happen, so yeah, so I got sick and had to wait and it stretched out a little bit longer than I would have liked. I did have a. It was interesting. I I don't even remember her name, which is a little bit sad, but an acquaintance. I didn't know this person very well, so if she's listening out here, she taught anthropology at UC Riverside and she came and would meet me after my appointments and she'd bring me a dozen donuts and we'd sit on the floor and we'd eat donuts. And those are the times you're supposed to be eating healthy and you're supposed to be keeping good. But it was so perfect. It was almost this like take that and um, it was, it was lovely. Um, and she's like I don't know what to tell you. I can't make it better, but let's just enjoy this sweet treat together and it was the most beautiful thing.
Speaker 2:It kind of makes me teary as I think about it, because I felt very cared for and I felt like there really isn't anything that's going to make it better. Let's just enjoy this and have this sweetness of this moment of a human being caring for another human being Enjoying a big box of donuts.
Speaker 1:I have a friend of mine. When I got cancer she told me that she had had breast cancer. I don't know how long ago, but she after she got her chemo treatments, they used to go to a Mexican restaurant and just drink a bunch of margaritas and stuff and like nowadays, you'd be like, okay, sugar, alcohol, yeah, no, that's not something we should be doing. That feeds the cancer, right, and I stopped drinking altogether during cancer.
Speaker 1:So, um, and eating any sugar I had sugar substitutes and things like that but, but the whole idea, though, for that you're talking about is this you felt cared for, like you had somebody who you know really truly cared about you and your mental state you know really truly cared about you and your mental state and, um it, she was a person that you could hold on to, um, who you know supported you, and I think that that is something that we all need, and sometimes they come out of the woodwork right, like we don't even know these people and they and that that happened to me.
Speaker 1:I had a lot of people who you know would reach out to me and I didn't even know them. Some of them I still have never met in person. Wow, they just you know, um, and we're still in touch, like we're on Facebook together or whatever. They follow me on Instagram and um, stuff like that. So, um, so you went through all the loss of hair and no, no, yeah, my.
Speaker 2:so my hair on my head did not fall out. So the particular chemo that I had had very small percentage of people whose hair on their head, so the hair everywhere else went out, no eyebrows.
Speaker 1:Okay, interesting.
Speaker 2:Weird. I cut my hair just in case, right. And then therefore, I sported this great fun, little haircut, little haircut, um. But I asked them about it and they the treatment that they chose, they saved the strongest one in case I needed it again. I don't like this, but they're like well, you know, we want to, we want to see this works, and if this, if it comes back, or if it doesn't work, then then we have a backup. So that was what they told me. But yeah, so it was a little bit strange to it thinned, but it didn't fall out, but I was sick and I didn't like I said, I got all these other kind of weird responses to the chemo that were a little bit unexpected. But yeah, so the I don't have that experience, so I can't really speak to what that was like to lose my hair, since other than there was this sense of like oh well, maybe you know I don't have a real treatment or there was a little bit of I don't know like, Is this going to work?
Speaker 1:Is this, you know?
Speaker 2:yeah, Because it would be better. If I lost my hair, then I'd be sure that it was terrible. Maybe it would be making if I lost my hair, then I'd be sure that it was terrible. Yeah, If it would be making it do that, yeah. So there was a little bit, it felt a little bit uncomfortable, and then there was this sense of like, well, you know, from other cancer patients, which is fine. But it was like, well, you don't, you know, you don't know what it's like. It's not as terrible as you know. So each deal with this in our own ways and, you know, sometimes we don't know how we're going to respond. So they're all forgiven.
Speaker 1:Well, it's all, it's uncharted territory, you know. I mean, I remember when I found out I was going to lose my hair and I was just obviously devastated. And you know, there were some people were like, oh Jamie, you know, you're gonna, you're gonna be fine, and then your hair is gonna grow back, and it grows back pretty quickly and and they were trying to, you know, like, talk me off the ledge and stuff like that. But I mean you, I feel like you just kind of have to go through the grieving of these things in your own way and talk to the people who are going to let you do that. I think that's super important. To say, yeah, it really sucks. This is like. Yeah, don't just say it, this is shitty.
Speaker 1:I am very much an advocate for letting people scream into the air and and just let yourself grieve. And um, you know, looking back, um, I did allow myself to do that and I did, and I did get a bad-ass haircut before I started the chemo because I wanted to. Um, you know, I wanted to take control of it myself. That's what I was told. That would be my a really good idea, and I always had long blonde hair for ever, for as long as I can remember and um you know, I cut my hair into this really cool, bad-ass haircut. I shaved the whole inside side over here, had an a line that came down here and I actually really loved it.
Speaker 1:And then, um, I told my husband I said now, really loved it. And then I told my husband I said now, once it starts coming out, this is when I want you to shave my head. And so we did. And so it started falling out, I brought the clippers, we went on a little vacation and brought it and he shaved it and I actually ended up really liking my shaved head. I was GI Jamie. And then and then when it started growing back you know I've gone through, you know it came back really super dark and super curly. Long story short, I never I keep cutting it, I'm like I keep it short, so yeah.
Speaker 2:I kept my hair short for a long, long time and then, sort of in rebellion, grew it out. That's on the old lady with the long hair. But yeah, it was interesting. So I remember going to I think it was, look Good, feel Better. That was the thing that the Cancer Society used to do and so they had these places where they were giving out wigs, and so I went and of course I was the youngest in the group by 40 years or something, it seemed like and so they had all these wigs and those. So they were so delighted because they had some of these wigs that they were like you know, these, you could wear this one, we can't, but you could. So they kept trying all these wigs on me. It was really funny, but it and I didn't end up losing my hair, but I got these wigs anyway and I still have them and my children have worn them for.
Speaker 1:Halloween costumes. You know, I never wore. I got a really amazing wig at the beginning and I never wore it. I wore turbans and beanies, or I went bald in my house. I didn't usually do that outside of my house but um, but uh, I I ended up wearing the wig, um, for a costume, a murder mystery costume thing, and I love it. It's super cute, but I just never, never. So how did you manage your treatments without a caregiver? Because you didn't have a caregiver. You had gone through a divorce, so how I know? And of course, you had your friends. So tell us a little more about that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I had a dog and a cat, so I spent a lot of time with my pets, crying to their fur and, you know, having them console me, and they were amazing, because pets can be amazing in that kind of way, you know, and they know when you're not happy and they don't say anything wrong or anything, and so it's perfect. So in that sense I felt good. I didn't feel lonely and I had some people. You know, I just kind of figured it out, you know. I figured out what I could cook and what I could eat. I had different people from what I recall I have different people who took me to treatments, like it wasn't one person every time.
Speaker 2:So I had kind of a and this was before like caring bridge or those kinds of things too, right, you know. So this was just word of mouth and friends and things, and so people volunteered and so I had different people at different times and that was nice. And then I had my friend, you know, who'd bring me donuts, and other friends who'd bring me other food and things like that. So it was. I don't know if I can actually answer that question of how I managed. It's just that I did, you know, and I I think that in some ways I think I do recall getting some brochures from the doctor or the cancer society or something where it was like have your kids set the table for you? You know, have your spouse or partner do whatever.
Speaker 2:They probably called it husband, you know, 30 years ago, but anyway you know, and, and I remember thinking, well, that's great Cause, that's not gonna happen. So so I just figured it out, um, and I use the friends and resources of the people that I had, and, um, I didn't expect a lot from myself. I allowed myself to do what I needed to do and I think it was an opportunity. I do remember thinking, okay, this is a character building opportunity, I don't need this, I like my character very well, thank you as it is, but I'm going to see how I can grow and learn from this. And I just did so. Yeah, I'm not sure, I don't know. I think the thing for me is and I found this throughout the course of my treatment and beyond is that so what's the alternative? The alternative is I can curl up in a ball in bed and not eat and not do what I need to do for my health, or I can find some resolve, some something left inside me to face this, and that's what I did.
Speaker 1:I like how you. I think I had that thought process when I was going through it too. What is the alternative? You either curl up and maybe die, or be depressed the whole entire time that you have breast cancer, or be depressed the whole entire time that you have breast cancer, or you find the joy in every opportunity that you can. So I know for me. We had to cancel several important trips. That was very devastating, and my husband and I decided that we were going to take our two German shepherd dogs, um, who were wonderful to me the whole entire time, especially Delilah, who died one year ago. Um, but she got me through the death of my mother and through my cancer and um. So we decided that we were going to do what we love to do best and that is to take the dogs and go camping.
Speaker 1:So, every time I had a treatment I got over the ick. Then the second week I felt a little bit better. By the third week I felt, you know, fairly normal and that's when we would go camping and so we would enjoy that time together and we went to the new places and things like that. So that was incredibly helpful. Yeah, and I drank my non-alcoholic IPA beer and you know, um, okay, so you so, because of the contrast, uh, maybe, of what you went through versus, maybe what you're seeing today, because there's a lot more support out there, so much more like you were talking about, you know, bras and things like that, I just interviewed someone also named Leah, who she developed a bra, a surgical bra, because of her experience with her mother having breast cancer and she's 24 years old, she has three strands and, like the recovery bras and it was really cool.
Speaker 1:So you had that thought process. But what you're doing right now gives back to the breast cancer community. Also, can you explain what that is and how that gives back to the breast cancer community or any community really? Who's people who are struggling?
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, unfortunately, cancer is something that if it doesn't happen to us, it happens to someone we know and very often to someone we deeply care about, and so it allows me a moment of empathy to be able to hear, in ways and you know, depending on the situation, um, you know I don't always share lots of my personal story in coaching, cause that's not really what it's about. But if a particular person um shares a cancer diagnosis, I'll ask them if they want to. You know, hear a little bit about mine, and most of the time I think part of it is is I can show that you can live after cancer, and I know that isn't true for everybody, unfortunately, but it can happen. And it's good to know that there are people out there who've lived long and you know lovely lives and that that it's possible to be able to be a person of hopefulness, certainly as a coach, being able to be there for people to help develop coping mechanisms for stress and uncertainty. That happen regardless of whether or not you have cancer.
Speaker 2:It's just compounded, I think, when there's a serious illness, whether it's cancer or not, I mean there's lots of other things that people have to deal with too, so that it's been a. It helps me feel more human, or, yeah, in the sense that I have a deeper understanding for people who go through struggle and I don't have to know or understand all of it, but that I can know that it's hard and I can be one of those people that's there for them regardless. And the nice thing about coaching is I don't have to fix it like, because you can't fix it anyway, but it's part of my profession. I'm there to support and help people figure out what it is that they need. Yeah, in terms of, you know, giving back to the, to the cancer community, one of the things that I've thought about is doing some volunteer coaching. I haven't done it yet I do. I do a lot of pro bono coaching for other kinds of causes and to support women in in in other situations, but that may be something I think about more in the future.
Speaker 1:Nice, nice. So how do people communicate with you? How do they get a hold of you? What is it? What do your sessions, I mean, are there? Are you online? Are you?
Speaker 2:Yep, I'm on, I'm online at appletoncoachingcom and, uh, I work for a couple of companies, so sometimes people uh are able to work with me because their company contracts with it, but I also take private clients. Um, I'm on LinkedIn. You can find me on Instagram because that's my walking page, Cause you know, I wrote a book about, about walking, um, which is also lovely when you think about it, because, um, I know, at least for me, when I was going through my treatment, Holly, I could barely walk around the block, Like I just didn't. I had been an avid runner and just didn't feel like I could have the energy to do that. So walking was a low, um, a lower energy, lower impact type of activity that I could do. I think now, if it you know, if I were to have to deal with cancer again, I'd probably do that a lot more than I did. I did it a little bit but because I found the benefits and sort of the physical as well as psychological benefits of walking.
Speaker 1:You and I have a little some parallels. I used to be an avid runner myself and and I remember when I went to chemo school, one of the things that they said is hey look, and even other people like therapists that I talked to it you know, when you go through your treatments, at the very least get up and walk every day, every couple hours, even if it's just to the mailbox and back you know, and so that's what I tell people that I know who've gotten cancer, I say you know what?
Speaker 1:whatever you do, get up and walk. And I know that it helps with the efficacy Um, it helps with, you know, getting it through your body. And so we used to take a walk every night, around dusk and in a beautiful sunset, around the block, the big block, and I would just sweat it out. And I remember getting back inside, even though I was so exhausted, I was sweating and I could feel it coming out my pores. Having a nice shower was always nice, but that walking piece is so, so important. If we find ourselves sitting on the couch, just peeled to the couch, the whole time, that's probably not good.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, and I also think that there's something about being outside whether you're dealing with cancer or whether you're dealing with something else that can remind you that there is life outside, just what you know right here in front of you, and so I think that that can be really healing.
Speaker 1:The sun comes up and beats down on your face. Of course, when you're going through chemo they say try not to be in the sun too much. But I used to sit out in our backyard and so I had these CBD THC balm that, um, I would help with bone and bone pain. I used to get into my jaw and all of so. I remember sitting out back and I had a little tincture to put in my coffee, like a peppermint tincture of of, uh, cbd.
Speaker 1:And I remember just sitting out there in the sun when the balloon races were going on and drinking my coffee with my CBD and it had a little tad touch of THC in it, not much but just enough, and same with the balm, and I remember sitting out there going. Yeah, I really feel like crap. But this is really beautiful and I've got my dogs here and I can see the balloons and I was sort of more calm and anything that works, man, anything that works.
Speaker 2:And you know it's funny, as you say that. You know that was not as well, it wasn't as easily accessible for me. However, I did have one person who was like here's some pot brownies, this is going to help you. You know, it was very funny. But I actually went up to San Francisco with a friend of mine, um, and we met up with some other friends and you know, unfortunately, uh, when I was going through chemo, there were still lots of things in San Francisco that supported people with AIDS and HIV, um, but there were places you could go, um, and you could get pot and, uh, they were like we'll help and support you in this. I'm like, no, it's because you want it. It was really funny. And then we're like we'll go out to eat because, you know, I had no appetite, you know, because I didn't feel like it. But I remember just people trying to be creative and trying to find ways to support. I'm glad there's a lot more opportunities and a lot more research on the things that can really help people feel better.
Speaker 1:I've never been like somebody who was like always a pot smoker or anything, because it makes me paranoid? Yeah, me neither. So they all thought I was a person. Yeah, I mean, I did have a friend of mine get me the RSO oil and so I would do a little bit of that and I was very careful about it and I will tell you that that did help me relax and it did help my stomach and it also helped with my appetite. So, um, I never, ever, got through the whole entire thing. It's sitting around somewhere, but I but, but I, when I was going through that, it was absolutely so helpful, so helpful, and I was so grateful that somebody brought that to me as a gift gummies and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:So, well, you know, we talk about, you know, cancer shaping the course of your life. I mean, you kind of intertwined that into our story as we've been talking. Is there anything else you'd like to share with that? Like, what is your thought process? I'm assuming that you went into this coaching primarily because of that, or was there something else that came about that had you developed that coaching program?
Speaker 2:What's interesting is that, you know, I'd been in higher education for my career and COVID was one of the reasons that this so, and COVID, you know COVID was like the whole world had cancer, you know, and so, um, I think that was another impetus, much more of a more current impetus. But what's interesting is that it's kind of connected back to this part of me that maybe, uh, it wasn't so much in the forefront, um, by that point in my life, um, when the one thing that I would share that I think was really helpful for me, um was, and and I share this when people ask is that I had to reframe what it meant to be okay, cause I was afraid I didn't want to die. Um, nobody seemed to know whether or not I would or not, and cause this was again kind of an. There weren't a lot of people my age going through this. They didn't really know. Um, I had my particular cancer, you know, when they they don't they do so many more tests on it now than they did then but it was ER PR negative and they thought, oh, this is super aggressive, this is, you know, problematic, et cetera. So I wanted to be okay, but I didn't feel okay, like the whole thing was not okay. I didn't want to go through it, as you had mentioned. I didn't want to have this just be the most. If this was the end of my life, I didn't want it to be the worst experience ever, because this was all I had.
Speaker 2:So I really had to readjust what it meant to be okay, and that's the thing that has stayed with me my entire life since then. I may not like this, but I can be okay and I no longer ever say, oh, thank God for my health, because I may not have my health and I can still be okay Even if my health isn't what I want. I have some after effects of chemo now. A lot of the soft tissue and my cartilage isn't good. My gums haven't been good, so I've had to deal with a lot of that as I age More. So I think I mean you deal with that anyway when you age. But this has been kind of exacerbated by, they think, by the chemo. They don't know for sure. But the being okay with where things are as they are has really helped because you know, life has all sorts of uncertainty that comes. It's not just cancer, there's many, many other things and it helped me be able to be both accepting and resilient at the same time.
Speaker 1:I like that, yeah, and you know we all go through such crazy things throughout our lives, most of them, some people more than others and you know, each time something happens, we have to figure out a way to be okay or to redefine who we are and redefine what we're going through. I mean, you know, you and I were talking before we started recording. Right now with our country there, there's a lot of, there's a lot of people who are struggling and I think it's important for people to know that there are a lot of people who are struggling, whether people agree with why or whatever. We have to watch out for that and we have to watch out for that and we have to help people figure out a way to find a purpose and you know things like that and to go on with life.
Speaker 1:So what advice do you have for people who've never been diagnosed with breast cancer? You know you talk about how you were stage two and that you had no lymph node involvement. That's the same with me. I was HER2 positive, erpr negative and they still took. When I did my surgery they still took like four lymph nodes, three from one side and one from the other side, just for good measure. So we know today, really knew then as well, but really really drive home the point that early detection is where it's at. And so for me, I'm like all about listen to your body. If there's something that's abnormal, like you had to advocate for yourself, I don't care what age you are, if that something is abnormal, you need to advocate for yourself and get something done.
Speaker 1:And I will tell you that I have had to actually advocate for myself to get screened since my surgery. So I had the deep flap surgery, which is the autologous surgery they take the tissue from your abdomen and I was told that I don't need mammograms anymore, I don't need anything anymore. This is what I've been told and it's scary to me because, you know, I hear all the time people getting you know reoccurrences and and I think to myself, how will I ever know if there's a reoccurrence if I'm never getting screened or I don't feel something right? And so, um, about a year ago maybe about a year to a year and a half ago I actually went into my gynecologist and said, hey, I feel a lump. And I really did feel a lump and I said but I don't have any mammograms or anything scheduled. So she actually was able to get me in to get an ultrasound turned out out okay this time.
Speaker 1:I have been feeling sensations and different things that have not set well with me, and I was able to advocate for myself to get an ultrasound, but then they just told me that they're going to do a diagnostics mammogram too. I'm like that's weird, because I was told that you don't get mammograms after, but they're going to do it anyway. We're doing it on Friday and I had to advocate for myself to do that because if I do get it back, I would like to be able to get it back in the lower stages so that I have a chance to live Right. So that's always my biggest piece you know, there.
Speaker 1:What kind of advice do you think that you and even if it's you know, similar, you know what? What do you usually tell people?
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm. Well, I think definitely self-advocate. And even if you don't have one of those symptoms you know you mentioned there's 12 symptoms maybe there's nothing you can see Cause, like for me it was, I just had a sense it's weird. If you have a sense, better to find out it's nothing than to just be like, oh no, you know people think I was weird or whatever. If you're uncomfortable, get it checked out, for whatever the reason is, and if your doctor doesn't do it, find a different one, because there are plenty of doctors who will be able to support you in that process.
Speaker 2:So, yes, the other thing is is that for people who, well, I think there's two things. One is cancer is a, is a very individual. It's a collective experience and an individual experience and and all of our, we're going to all go through it differently. And so if you know someone they may not be, you know if your friend has it, it may be different than when your aunt had it, which may be different than when grandpa or whatever. Right, so that recognizing that each, unfortunately, each new opportunity is this kind of new thing for the person, and so, therefore, you can learn things, but don't always assume that people are going to experience a cancer or that you're going to, if you have it, end up getting diagnosed, that you're going to experience it, just like the people you know.
Speaker 2:So that's, I think, an important thing to remember. The other thing is what was helpful for me, even though I was really shocked. I was healthy, you know, and I still am healthy, and I took care of myself, and it is a lot easier to face a difficult medical diagnosis If you've been taking care of yourself, if you have, you know, social connections and resources, if you have exercise routines and you eat relatively well and you know what I mean. So so I think that, um, if someone doesn't have some of those things in place, now's a good time.
Speaker 2:You know, the more that you do to take good care of yourself all the way around emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, socially, all those parts of wellbeing, Um. It's a little bit easier to do when things are going well, Um, and then you'll have resources, um, in the the event that that something happens that surprises you and takes you sideways because cancer does Right.
Speaker 1:That is such a good piece of advice Because when I was diagnosed I was also very healthy. I had I had even just lost weight that I had gained during COVID lost weight that I had gained during COVID and you know I was exercising, I was eating really well, all the things, and people were pretty shocked that I got breast cancer, because they're like my God, you were healthy and I'm like I am healthy.
Speaker 1:And, like I say in a lot of my episodes, healthy people can get cancer. We all have cancer cells, we all have those cells right. Healthy people can get cancer. We all have cancer cells, we all have those cells right. But healthy people can get cancer. And the point is is that you want to be healthy.
Speaker 2:You don't want to say well, I guess.
Speaker 1:I'm just going to be unhealthy because everybody gets cancer, so I might as well just do all this stuff. Why am I taking care of my body if I'm probably going to get cancer anyway? No, the point is is that you can get through the treatments easier. It's never easy, but you can get through it easier than if you were not healthy, and so that's what you know. The point that we need to drive home for sure. Well, I, we are so lucky to have you in our community, leah I. Um, we need people like you.
Speaker 1:And I actually did reach out when I when I was like in my deep dark, crazy, oh, my God, I have cancer. It was in the middle of the night and I got onto Facebook and I was searching around for help and I found this guy, eddie Ennever, and he's a three-time cancer survivor in Australia and he became a therapist because he it's almost like he cracked the code, like to figure out why this was happening, you know. And he became a therapist and I sent him a message on Facebook and said hey, you know, I'm in the United States, I just got cancer. I ran across your page. I'm wondering if we might be able to talk about how you can help me and he responded back very quickly.
Speaker 1:We had, you know, we had a few sessions together. He helped me learn what kind of foods were really good to eat, what supplements that you should and should not take, and he even talked to me about enemas and you know all that stuff. He even talked to me about enemas and all that stuff and ultimately I ended up interviewing him and I read to him the message that I sent to him and what he sent back to me. It was very powerful. So, reaching out to a therapist like you to help you if you get God forbid get this cancer, reaching out to people like you to help navigate everything and I actually have a therapist that I still to this day talk to here in Reno and she's helped me through other things since cancer is just so helpful because being able to talk about it, cry about it, scream about it, laugh about it, all the things is so important, you know.
Speaker 2:Well and I'm not a therapist but as a coach, you know those we are trying to help people through, you know, through crises as well. The other thing I would say and I'll just say this in closing cause, I know we're coming to the end of our time, but one of the things we didn't talk about but if someone is curious and wants just to hear this part of my story, they're welcome to reach out is that I had kids after cancer. I breastfed babies with one breast, and so that can be possible as well. Oh, good.
Speaker 2:And that's a great part of my story.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that is a great part, because life does go on and you are able to do that. I mean, I've had people that I've interviewed who were pregnant at the time that they got cancer. It's like, how does that work, you know Well. So I in the show notes I have how to reach you on Instagram. I mean how to reach you on LinkedIn, and also your, your website, appletoncoachingcom, and your phone number and your email address. I also do you have a link to your?
Speaker 2:book. If you go on my website there's a thing that says book and you click on that and you can find it there.
Speaker 1:How easy is that? Well, leah, this has been such a joy to talk to you. You have such a powerful story, a powerful message, and you give back to the community in ways that we absolutely 100% need, and I just appreciate your being here. Is there anything you'd like to say before we wrap up?
Speaker 2:I think, just to go back to the thing that I learned through my process is that I wish for you and for others who are going through cancer or who may, in the future, be able to figure out and be okay, okay enough, okay in that moment, and my hope for you all is that you can Awesome.
Speaker 1:Thank you, leah. You're welcome and to my audience. I really appreciate your joining us again on this episode of Test those Breasts and, as usual, I would love for you to go to your favorite platform and rate and review this particular podcast, just because it does really help get the word out to other people around the world about the podcast. And I, again, I just I love you all and I will see you next time on the next episode of Test those Breasts. Bye for now, friends.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Test those Breasts. I hope you got some great much needed information that will help you with your journey. As always, I am open to guests to add value to my show and I'm also open to being a guest on other podcasts where I can add value. So please reach out if you'd like to collaborate. My contact information is in the show notes and, as a reminder, rating, reviewing and sharing this podcast will truly help build a bigger audience all over the world. I thank you for your efforts. I look forward to sharing my next episode of Test those Breasts.
